ReaLity Mic-Check....

You get tired of living for the moments of right now, when you want them to last forever....
check the weather...
Cumulus Clouds that i'm sitting on....
thinking about life feeling like it gonna storm...
going from white...
 then turning into gray
hasn't even been a  minute, my hands started shake..
after i read one Psalm....139:23


I was told to it was powerful so i had see...
what happens..
Action...Action....
Palms hot, mind heavy
feeling like God bout to break My levy..
allow all the self-pain to leak out...
 cause i been drowning myself ..trying reach out..
but forgiving me was the ball and chain...tied my to ankles
something i refused to do until i "MADE" 
it


all the hearts that I broke..Promises too...All the lies that i told....
all the things that i hid..Are you Listening dude?Convincing myself this the life that chose...and if I'm the only one, please cast ya stones....Really...Really?


who am i kidding....
I am sin...
I guess this what it means to be human...Free will....
like that shit was in jail...
Flesh vs. Spirit ,which one will prevail...
 They are the  ying and yang.....coexisting 
it aint nothing about G-Thang...G is Good...


The more  i realize....about this real life...the position
i'm put in, For the things that I'm putting,
 for my mind to absorb...Guess thats why i picked up the bible
Cause i was lacking accord....


Trying my hardest to look to future to see a reward through all these battle scars...
its hard to do when you stand from afar....
some I inflicted...by mistakes...but its part of the process...
i guess... hope that i use them right...the lessons i learned...
if something's too hot, you will get burned...


If you in a line, you gotta wait your turn....
If you not aligned, you better make adjustments...
or get left by your loves...cause they'll be ready to jump...
ship....


leave you, abandon......
cant afford to be alone..
 getting it right the first time son....
People steady ask-on....
Where im going? 
Im hoping and wishing 
Every-time that i step to the mic like frat.. to sing my soul out...
that i continue to see the light...
through my expressions...


of this Reality Mic-Check

I Call It Clearing My mind....

Turned  the Silence Up and the
 Noise down...let my heartbeat speak, just create sound....
its decibels faint. yet so profound...
..its overworked and underpaid....shedding light on souls...but getting none back....
If life's a bitch, I'm just proposing, cause I'm fxcking her til die...with sallie mae by her side....
having  threesomes with debt....birthing bad credit....til it gets paid off...instead she like Maddoff..Made Off...Makes Off...with.


So I stop to wonder why? the devil aint sign me?
he said your flow's too ice..... i said what the hell does that mean?
your melody too frigid......colder then a snowstorm in the middle
of december...Can you remember?


 those Homeless nights...sleeping in the whip...
dreaming that you'd never shit on ya family....but seems like this just aint right...
puzzling...how people' lies longer than repunzle
Here I would say that i digress...but I know how depress feels...something that can break you down...till ya ankles and ya wrist feel...the same size on some small shit...people like you lost weight....


pause..........


Im lost wait........ Sheding weakness is what they meant...but there is still a apart of me ....that needs to be fine tuned...my conscious loves me, but physical shows the wounds....of soul who battles himself...
I call it a genius struggle, or fool's down fall....
Feeling like im too humble....so i crawl....this cruise control that I'm on is not working....about to Break this comfort zone...cause i feel no growth...like it was stunted by my experiences...
Putting these lines out since these words release are therapy......


my brain waves create it own patterns...
random thoughts that become cohesive collectively
to mold these fragments of poetry...
I only find peace within simplicity....
a hike along the Delaware Gap Will Suit Reeves...
Music or Reticence ......a beautiful woman's presence...her aroma...skin's fiber is the essence for love...
I find peace....rewind... i give piece...


stepped out of myself... i guess its time to return me...                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   .as if my thoughts were yelling from a mountain's peak...
only echoes of forgiveness travel....
Cause i tried to bury myself within life's gravel...stones....and big boulders....


at first i felt like the hulk..could carry anything on my shoulders and not a burden too heavy.....
but Reality Checked Me hard like Gretzky...Tried to take my legs from under me so when i got back up ..i'd be walking knocked knee...i refuse to fall...cause the fight in this beast, will cease it all.

Thoughts Everywhere Part II

Im some other other other other other other shit........
Thoughts on locked with no keys.....Florida...
Where Ya Palms at? they're already open.......
 waiting for cash to flow in....
Thats people though, when you got dough,
rolling....
.
Why they acting like they needing it...
Emmmeffer ,This my hard work....
what role you play....In My Mid Summer's Night dream....It was 3am... still recording....
4th of july....you were out partying....
While I was pouring ,
bottles of my soul out.....
Mad Ink Wetting the pads up .....


fingers touching screen...Iphone4...notes app......
Bar after bar....Line after line....Just stay up....
Since i was told Sleep is for weary....
My nose red, Eyes teary....
Here them birds make its easy....
screeching......Raven...
Never more....


Where The Fuck's Eleanor......
Call me a  Poe quoter...
Reeves Cards already dealt,Poker....
Learning how to fold 'em
and When I need to Hold 'em
Friends Close , Enemies closer
New Acquaintances, bunch of posers....


Do what I got do to survive
Since  there aint no church in the wild....
Atheist......Is what i've become.....
All i do is evil,  Whoops Correction, I meant  live
spell it backwards its the same thing
one without other then your Lost Your Mind....
Ying Without Yang, wrong design.....


No sins...Just humans...
Sexuality, there is none.....
But choose your species carefully....
Cause Apes Got Tricks up there fur-sleeves.....
Hahaha! Where am I? 
Jungles don't take no prisoners
Alpha I'll be....this how deep my vision was....
MLK, Peep the Acronym...
Know those letters? Do You Remember Him?
What was his dreams? Can you Handle 'em?


Create, Learn, Realize.....
That even the Future will tell you lies....
It's Just the Past, Rockin a New disguise....

I DID....

Trying to figure out...Trying To Figure Out...Snorting this Roxy Pain.... 
Why It got me Higher than Super, maaaneee?....
Only time i can write is when I overdo love...
leaving me with emotions i can't explain....
Adrenaline kicking from the hurt has my brain 
firing synapses insane.....
the words flow to create more magic then David Blaine....


People saying why this nigga doing drugs now...
He been chillin with the rich white boys.... and New Years Eve was beyond crazy
Webster Hall, My Memories Inception
Talking then licking women...
Using my digits to see whats in them.....
Wanting to leave...Cause they Know I'm next...
I guess .....
the Ecstasy really had me trippin....or maybe its the adderall I popped before
that.... had Iris my on dilate...
Hyper Happiness..
saying hi to Molly..how you doing...hahaha....


Yea I lost it, trying to Regain Me....
I guess.....
 I need to stop trying to Smash every chick that's within a distance reach
How else they gonna feel me?
All of Their Beautiful Hearts want to heal to Reeves
Reading what I think causes Worry...
Even More, With Every Story...Sky Skraper... 
I'm Reaching to heaven just to touch an angel so my soul can still feel an ounce of good...
cause the evil in me about to take over...
with Money as the root  while the seed grows...


After this I'll Get a Text.....R U OK? 
What does this  piece Mean? 
Is It All Truth, Or Part Dream?
I'ma leave it Alone ....You decide.....
There's only soo much one man can hide....
I'm just passionate about what inside...
I just know life's experiences got me feeling different.
If  Reality don't Kill me, I surely know my mind will.
Chatted with the best of them... From those on top of the hill... 
old heads had  the best Advice....
People who had addictions....Told me to Work Harder...Past Potential.....
funny how I don't know where it starts....or If it ends....
Staring off into the Smoking Section....
The weed clears....
Then I see My Reflection...But I see grey....
I love my reflection..... But I don't,CJ.....I mean me....


Never was I afraid to fall.....but imagine falling forever....
Your Whole Life  as far as you remember...
Working to Stop....Its Never Enough....The Journey's Hard and The Road to Success been more than rough!
Jesse Said Best...." You Can't QUIT!"
2011 I saw movement....All these letters  They GOnE HIT!
Strike Nerves....More Chords....Piano keys of thee Atlantic's Seas
2012 Take All Of it......Mind,Body, Surpass the Spirit....
This is shit so deep, YOUR CORE Feels it......
I had to share...
I'm sorry now.....
That I Did..That I did.....I did....

Any different.

As much i hate emotion...i give it my all
devotion...
display it every line, extreme consciousness at the
 drop of a dime, falling into Change...
In me...
I
M


hoping you get a quote from atleast one line...
Rhyme with reason....Reason without rhyme in my own pattern...
cause i hate structure..so i make mine work.... mind work...digging for diamonds...coal mine work....
let experiences show...clock work...cause time is  the only answer to growth...
Steady....pace...
like the maker...
heart replacer....
which direction ....
i dont know...thats why I search ..travel
New discoveries ....unravel....
Hidden truths....buried within life's gravel..


I
M


on some soul search....Trying to figure
why we make things complicated...
When certain things should just be...
Like how I question marriage...cause people don't have answers why men cheat....
simple it goes against instinct....like telling a carnivore not to eat meat...
It can be controlled.....but it seems like the ticker is weak...
I've become an athiest.....but i still believe..
There is something more ....beyond what we see....
or this could be it and i wouldn't feel..


any different...

Some thoughts put together...

I thought my lungs had wings, ready to fly,
 Exhale out.....so my words can sore....
Further more...so my thoughts can explore...Your..
Mind...
I say your mind...cause i get tired of mine...


how about i live through you....
get lost in your equations...and in your shoes...
whether it be...Jordan's or Jimmy choo's....
elegant but the "hood" still in you....
i'd allow you to choose...


Race doesn't matter....cause Im in this for the long run,
Cross Country
Discriminate? Who?
No one's perfect,
Flawless...
Try to show me someone ...
its pretty evident there are none...


All the women dont have the same name,Label
Just a bunch of asses but they all different sizes....
Like life....
Just bunch stories but they all different covers....
sheets...
that blanket underlying plots....
schemes....
but all connect our beginnings from one scene...
.
..Mother...May I....Africa...say ....I....
I and I Jah know...
I'm just off on tangents.... low-key rambling...
rumbling in the jungle..
.but its more like gambling....
since the paint is peeling..
when the chips are down
tryna  lose all feeling.
Novocaine.... Novocaine....
Numb Me Now....

Just A Current Rant of Mind

      I woke up this morning thinking that life is just a paradox, because it is essentially. We exist in a world  where things  contradict themselves ,where time is something that we as humans or a society have created. In my opinion majority of the things man has created are both good and bad, but has only seemed to make life more complicated than it should be. I say that because if we go back to our basic way of thinking ; survival, eat,excrete,sleep,be active,reproduce.Things (in my opinion) are simple and less of a headache.  I say this because when remove all the confusion man has put into the equation, I find a certain peace. My thoughts over the years have been uncontrollable for the most part due to things like religion and trying to figure out what to do in order to survive in the society that has been created on earth. 
         I've bounced back and forth countless of times whether to believe in a "God", "Deity", what have you  only to wreck my brain by the overwhelming thoughts. Reason they were overwhelming because I was trying to factor in why certain "things" would happen to me , why they happened, if they changed or altered whats ahead of me in a positive or negative way, because I couldn't fit an explanation for them. With certain situations taking place it started to change my view of life as well as knowing that there is soo much more to us than what we know.  
         For some reason when i read this line " God is not going to do for you what you can do for yourself" plenty of things began to just make sense because, we all have the tools to do what we need for ourselves, it just how we deal with others in those positions to help you achieve and your will to get what you deserve (in your opinion/perception).   Which brings me to my new formed conclusion of how to deal with this term called "life". We are here for an allotted period and we need make the most of  what it is we are put here to do/function. Know that humans are a species type of animal, just more conscious, so being aware of  as much as possible is a must. Beings that are dominant to different degrees are going to survive while those who are not, won't. 
       Aspects of life nowadays have become more like chess because decisions are weighed more heavily with this evolution of "being". My younger brother closest to the age I am put it best for me " Just when I think my body has been put through the worst conditions, I've always been able to push through, and find that I can endure more,more, and even more" this applies to every facet of  being human, so I'm just going to push until i cant push no more...explore until I can't explore no more...just be until my physical can't be no more.


Hopefully if you read this you were able to pull something out of it and made things less stressful on your mind...or if not..it was something for you read...explore...think about..etc..


until next time.....peaaccceeee
- Reeves