Fulfill It

Yea.... I'm starting a new journey, 

who knew'd music be the one calling, 

me....

Making progress quite rapidly,

Like if this was my destiny.

So, I ran into Trife did some music with him....

Then I ran into Lance...where this chapter begins...

Use my voice and his pen let the sparking commence!

Got some hits on our hands like we been fighting lyrics for soo long!

Hooks so hard, it leaves ear drums mangled!

Melody so sweet, ya girl clothes dismantled! 

First show out of the state....maaaan, I couldn't believe this....

Wishing Mendoza was here to see his

grandson perform liiiiiivvveee! 

its Ya blood in my veins that got me musically inclined....

for that i thank you every-time, i sing a verse....i spit a bar...

I touch a stage or grace a mic...

Crazy how life works when it come these things....

when ya chest touching ground 

and you down on luck..

God's ya reason to push-up 

never quit or give up...

Remembering all of the times when I was restless as hell/

Pacing back and forth  like a tiger in cell/

Took every cell in me not to end it all/

pause...I got issues..

Pardon my mentaaallllll....

Understanding you can only give trust as far as you can throw it,

Done being heroic since Apathy has developed.

Stopped putting others in front of me

cause a niggas discontent grows and blossoms envy

doing anything to devise your demise

Just watch ya back and think critical

to keep the bullshit to minimal.

So much to take in and even though I know the least,

the fear of failing keep pushing me

 to newer heights

Another bite, then i will have swallowed my pride....

Only to perpetuate the leader bubbling inside..

Starting realize my role in this picture....my only outcome is to win...

From NY to NJ, From NC to the A, From The A to Bay......I gotta kill it....

I gotta kill it.....I gotta Killl it...

Cause if i don't I hope the angel's take back my spirit....

that's ONLY if I can't fulfill it. 

-Reeves

Don't Read The Whole Thing...

I think about it every night.....every minute, millisecond that I write
How much longer do I really have to fight? like a man with a knife.... in a cage with lion
Feeling like hell, when I just want reach Zion.
I may complain sometimes but I'm trying, 
When the will in me seems its like dying, I only get hungrier...
 like tapeworms in the stomach African
Back on trail to get that math again, 

(Talk to 'em!)

I look around me and see what's happening
Niggas that were Down For Life...
 turned bitch-made overnight...
is it Envy that you feeling? Speak up nigga what's reason?
Mufuggah, I'm struggling too! let me guess....
want me to be worst off than you!
Well, it aint gonna  happen!
Thank you for getting rid of ya self,no clapping,
Matter of fact, Pardon my back! 

 (Talk to 'em!)

hahahha, my bad readers...I'm venting...
I don't do that pretend thing...
Smile in ya face, then when your turn away, set flames to ya name...
Enemies stay the same but friends they change,
I don't mean to be cliche...but I'm just saying, that this saying never been so apparent
til right now...

and this is just the beginning...when the future comes I hope its no killing...
No clips my way, Lord willing...
unless its a track that i'm singing
 Over, going under with the harmonies...
Getting girls moist like home-made brownies...hahaha 

(Get personal!)

Talks of losing the house cause of Sallie Mae
Put me between razors and a sharp place
Its cutting me down to size
Starting to chop up my pride
gotta do this on my own
even it means be alone, til i make it
sacrifice making
ME....
Measure myself during these trials
God only tests the best cause its
worth the while....
and i get it...

(End it!)

Even though i get distraught at times 
Even Become distant, 
Cause I don't want to pull loved ones in to this shit
Know that I'm still here
You'll see me when I come up for air.

ReaLity Mic-Check....

You get tired of living for the moments of right now, when you want them to last forever....
check the weather...
Cumulus Clouds that i'm sitting on....
thinking about life feeling like it gonna storm...
going from white...
 then turning into gray
hasn't even been a  minute, my hands started shake..
after i read one Psalm....139:23


I was told to it was powerful so i had see...
what happens..
Action...Action....
Palms hot, mind heavy
feeling like God bout to break My levy..
allow all the self-pain to leak out...
 cause i been drowning myself ..trying reach out..
but forgiving me was the ball and chain...tied my to ankles
something i refused to do until i "MADE" 
it


all the hearts that I broke..Promises too...All the lies that i told....
all the things that i hid..Are you Listening dude?Convincing myself this the life that chose...and if I'm the only one, please cast ya stones....Really...Really?


who am i kidding....
I am sin...
I guess this what it means to be human...Free will....
like that shit was in jail...
Flesh vs. Spirit ,which one will prevail...
 They are the  ying and yang.....coexisting 
it aint nothing about G-Thang...G is Good...


The more  i realize....about this real life...the position
i'm put in, For the things that I'm putting,
 for my mind to absorb...Guess thats why i picked up the bible
Cause i was lacking accord....


Trying my hardest to look to future to see a reward through all these battle scars...
its hard to do when you stand from afar....
some I inflicted...by mistakes...but its part of the process...
i guess... hope that i use them right...the lessons i learned...
if something's too hot, you will get burned...


If you in a line, you gotta wait your turn....
If you not aligned, you better make adjustments...
or get left by your loves...cause they'll be ready to jump...
ship....


leave you, abandon......
cant afford to be alone..
 getting it right the first time son....
People steady ask-on....
Where im going? 
Im hoping and wishing 
Every-time that i step to the mic like frat.. to sing my soul out...
that i continue to see the light...
through my expressions...


of this Reality Mic-Check

I Call It Clearing My mind....

Turned  the Silence Up and the
 Noise down...let my heartbeat speak, just create sound....
its decibels faint. yet so profound...
..its overworked and underpaid....shedding light on souls...but getting none back....
If life's a bitch, I'm just proposing, cause I'm fxcking her til die...with sallie mae by her side....
having  threesomes with debt....birthing bad credit....til it gets paid off...instead she like Maddoff..Made Off...Makes Off...with.


So I stop to wonder why? the devil aint sign me?
he said your flow's too ice..... i said what the hell does that mean?
your melody too frigid......colder then a snowstorm in the middle
of december...Can you remember?


 those Homeless nights...sleeping in the whip...
dreaming that you'd never shit on ya family....but seems like this just aint right...
puzzling...how people' lies longer than repunzle
Here I would say that i digress...but I know how depress feels...something that can break you down...till ya ankles and ya wrist feel...the same size on some small shit...people like you lost weight....


pause..........


Im lost wait........ Sheding weakness is what they meant...but there is still a apart of me ....that needs to be fine tuned...my conscious loves me, but physical shows the wounds....of soul who battles himself...
I call it a genius struggle, or fool's down fall....
Feeling like im too humble....so i crawl....this cruise control that I'm on is not working....about to Break this comfort zone...cause i feel no growth...like it was stunted by my experiences...
Putting these lines out since these words release are therapy......


my brain waves create it own patterns...
random thoughts that become cohesive collectively
to mold these fragments of poetry...
I only find peace within simplicity....
a hike along the Delaware Gap Will Suit Reeves...
Music or Reticence ......a beautiful woman's presence...her aroma...skin's fiber is the essence for love...
I find peace....rewind... i give piece...


stepped out of myself... i guess its time to return me...                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   .as if my thoughts were yelling from a mountain's peak...
only echoes of forgiveness travel....
Cause i tried to bury myself within life's gravel...stones....and big boulders....


at first i felt like the hulk..could carry anything on my shoulders and not a burden too heavy.....
but Reality Checked Me hard like Gretzky...Tried to take my legs from under me so when i got back up ..i'd be walking knocked knee...i refuse to fall...cause the fight in this beast, will cease it all.

Thoughts Everywhere Part II

Im some other other other other other other shit........
Thoughts on locked with no keys.....Florida...
Where Ya Palms at? they're already open.......
 waiting for cash to flow in....
Thats people though, when you got dough,
rolling....
.
Why they acting like they needing it...
Emmmeffer ,This my hard work....
what role you play....In My Mid Summer's Night dream....It was 3am... still recording....
4th of july....you were out partying....
While I was pouring ,
bottles of my soul out.....
Mad Ink Wetting the pads up .....


fingers touching screen...Iphone4...notes app......
Bar after bar....Line after line....Just stay up....
Since i was told Sleep is for weary....
My nose red, Eyes teary....
Here them birds make its easy....
screeching......Raven...
Never more....


Where The Fuck's Eleanor......
Call me a  Poe quoter...
Reeves Cards already dealt,Poker....
Learning how to fold 'em
and When I need to Hold 'em
Friends Close , Enemies closer
New Acquaintances, bunch of posers....


Do what I got do to survive
Since  there aint no church in the wild....
Atheist......Is what i've become.....
All i do is evil,  Whoops Correction, I meant  live
spell it backwards its the same thing
one without other then your Lost Your Mind....
Ying Without Yang, wrong design.....


No sins...Just humans...
Sexuality, there is none.....
But choose your species carefully....
Cause Apes Got Tricks up there fur-sleeves.....
Hahaha! Where am I? 
Jungles don't take no prisoners
Alpha I'll be....this how deep my vision was....
MLK, Peep the Acronym...
Know those letters? Do You Remember Him?
What was his dreams? Can you Handle 'em?


Create, Learn, Realize.....
That even the Future will tell you lies....
It's Just the Past, Rockin a New disguise....

I DID....

Trying to figure out...Trying To Figure Out...Snorting this Roxy Pain.... 
Why It got me Higher than Super, maaaneee?....
Only time i can write is when I overdo love...
leaving me with emotions i can't explain....
Adrenaline kicking from the hurt has my brain 
firing synapses insane.....
the words flow to create more magic then David Blaine....


People saying why this nigga doing drugs now...
He been chillin with the rich white boys.... and New Years Eve was beyond crazy
Webster Hall, My Memories Inception
Talking then licking women...
Using my digits to see whats in them.....
Wanting to leave...Cause they Know I'm next...
I guess .....
the Ecstasy really had me trippin....or maybe its the adderall I popped before
that.... had Iris my on dilate...
Hyper Happiness..
saying hi to Molly..how you doing...hahaha....


Yea I lost it, trying to Regain Me....
I guess.....
 I need to stop trying to Smash every chick that's within a distance reach
How else they gonna feel me?
All of Their Beautiful Hearts want to heal to Reeves
Reading what I think causes Worry...
Even More, With Every Story...Sky Skraper... 
I'm Reaching to heaven just to touch an angel so my soul can still feel an ounce of good...
cause the evil in me about to take over...
with Money as the root  while the seed grows...


After this I'll Get a Text.....R U OK? 
What does this  piece Mean? 
Is It All Truth, Or Part Dream?
I'ma leave it Alone ....You decide.....
There's only soo much one man can hide....
I'm just passionate about what inside...
I just know life's experiences got me feeling different.
If  Reality don't Kill me, I surely know my mind will.
Chatted with the best of them... From those on top of the hill... 
old heads had  the best Advice....
People who had addictions....Told me to Work Harder...Past Potential.....
funny how I don't know where it starts....or If it ends....
Staring off into the Smoking Section....
The weed clears....
Then I see My Reflection...But I see grey....
I love my reflection..... But I don't,CJ.....I mean me....


Never was I afraid to fall.....but imagine falling forever....
Your Whole Life  as far as you remember...
Working to Stop....Its Never Enough....The Journey's Hard and The Road to Success been more than rough!
Jesse Said Best...." You Can't QUIT!"
2011 I saw movement....All these letters  They GOnE HIT!
Strike Nerves....More Chords....Piano keys of thee Atlantic's Seas
2012 Take All Of it......Mind,Body, Surpass the Spirit....
This is shit so deep, YOUR CORE Feels it......
I had to share...
I'm sorry now.....
That I Did..That I did.....I did....